Real Talk

The Quarter-Life Crisis

Ok, so maybe it wasn’t a crisis but I started to really think about some things when I turned 25. I realized that I was no longer in my early twenties and should probably stop acting like it (or should I?). Here are some of the questions I had running through my head:

Have I accomplished everything I wanted to accomplish by this age?

Was I becoming the person that I wanted to be and the best version of myself?

Where did I want to be with my career, love life, finances and faith in the next 5 years?

I’ll be honest, I kind of started freaking out because I couldn’t confidently answer any of those questions! What had I been doing with my life the last 3 years since graduating from college? Oh yeah, I was trying to get my s**t together.

Quarter Life CrisisSo here I am, sitting equally between 20 and 30. Why is that so hard? This should be the best year of my life! Right? Well here’s the hard thing: everyone around you is at completely different points in their lives and that can make things a little confusing. Some of my friends are still partying (a little too hard) while others are married with two children. Some days I’m envious of the first group and somedays I’m envious of the latter. But most of the time I don’t really want either right now.

The truth is, there’s nothing that says you have to be at a particular place or should do certain things by the age of 25. At least not anymore. You can be wherever you want to be. But to me, that’s the hard part. I like having a plan and timelines and schedules and guidelines. So when I look back at the past 25 years it’s hard for me to say if I am happy with where I’m at because I have nothing to gauge it with. That means I’m not failing, but it also doesn’t necessarily mean that I’m “winning”.

You can look at everything you’ve accomplished and everything you’ve experienced and be happy. You can be satisfied or even ecstatic about it. The problem is when we look to the person next to us. They’ve been more places, built their own business, bought a new car and fallen in love. So now, what you’ve done doesn’t seem so great because they seem to have done the past 5 years better and bigger than you did.

My advice (mostly advice to myself), keep your blinders on. You’re running your own race and what other people are doing doesn’t influence what you’re doing. Also, don’t be so afraid that time is running out. It’s not. You most likely have 2/3 of your life or more ahead of you. So slow down and appreciate 25 for what it is.

Now go get drunk off brunch mimosas while you still can.


2 thoughts on “The Quarter-Life Crisis”

  1. 🙌🏼 to brunch mimosas and ❤️ to the rest. 😄 I found myself in a very similar place at 25, again at 30, and some days still. This is a great reminder of the ultimate conclusion that snaps me out of it: I can’t keep comparing my behind the scenes to everyone else’s highlight reel. I’m not here to live anyone else’s story. I’m far too busy writing my own. You nailed it, Hal! Keep writing and sharing.


    1. Thank you so much for taking the time to leave a comment. It’s always nice to hear that you’re not alone and that your struggles are the same ones that a lot of people are dealing with. Thanks for the encouragement and I encourage you to keep writing YOUR best story.


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